Yawn, yawn.............then one glorious goal by the Liverpool Towers

Image via Wikipedia GNU Free Documentation License"

Aston Villa v Liverpool in that yawning gap between Boxing Day and New Year's Eve, and in the evening, at that, ko 8.45, UK time. It was a keen contest in a snow storm for a good deal of the time. Speccy Martin O'Neill braving the chill in his tracksuit and gloves to show himself to his team and remind then never to falter. Bunty Benitez in his shelter looking twitchy. At 0-0 they go into added-on time and guess what? Who is going to score? Which player needs only a chance, a small space, and can hit the ball without a falter?

There was a tired players episode of table football, the ball bouncing off one player or another but close to the Aston Villa goal. A fair-haired striker without his Alice Band today is in a space on the edge of the box as the ball comes to him. One touch and across the advancing goalkeeper Friedel, the ball travels along the turf and crosses the line just inside the goalpost. 1-0 to Liverpool. The final whistle. O'Neill is on his knees. Benitez in his box does a few tries at confident twitches as if he knew what was going to happen all along.

The long yawn was stifled. Torres ('Towers' in Spanish) provided the moment that made it all worthwhile.

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Great Players make Great Games - in Double Quick Time

On Sunday 27th December, 2009, I slept through most of the Arsenal v Aston Villa match on television, the 3rd and 4th teams in the English Premier League. I woke up to a 0-0 score line with Fabregas just starting as a sub in the second half. What followed was the best 28 minutes I have seen this season and maybe ever. He scored from a devastating free kick, curling it over the line of opponents into the far side of the goal which they were defending. He followed this by masterminding continuous attacks on the Villa goal and ended by a dash into space to score his second. In doing this he aggravated the hamstring injury, the reason for his starting on the bench. He was then substituted but had already done enough to be the Man of the Match and the master of his trade in an appearance lasting less than half an hour.
The Sky Television pundit Jamie Redknapp whose garrulous comments often contain some gems - probably overheard from his Dad, Harry, the Tottenham manager - gave me the first part of the title of this piece.

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Cool foot Frank

We already know the bazaar qualities of the English Premier League with flashy foreign imports which often don't work, eg Robinho. This weekend the EPL showed some bizarre qualities.

Bizarre item 1

On Saturday Manchester United had the chance to catch up on points with Chelsea by winning at Fulham. The three points would have brought them level with a faltering Chelsea - with only one win in the last three matches. With many defenders injured and unavailable, experienced manager Ferguson chose midfielders Carrick and Fletcher alongside regular full-back, Evra, and reserve team player De Laet as a back four. Man U lost 3-0. Why, with 9 reserve defenders, did the manager not choose two more of them? This is one of the sports where the young have no fear. They may be less-experienced in big matches but would be orientated to defending. Carrick's instinct is to pass the ball forward. He followed his instinct early on, a short pass forward to Scholes, who lost the ball to Murphy, the Fulham captain, who ran forward and scored. Carrick was too near his own goal to play a short pass but his instincts tricked him. Would a trained defender have done this?

Bizarre item 2

On Sunday, the day after Man U 's defeat, Chelsea had the opportunity  to go 6 points ahead at the top of the table. They were playing West Ham at the bottom of the table. What did they do? They drew, 1-1, and were lucky to do so. They were slow, unimaginative, dull and toothless. They should have lost - particularly as there could have been a penalty for the Hammers when Carvalho of Chelsea jumped on the back of a West Ham player as the ball arrived in the goal mouth from a corner. Chelsea drew level through a penalty when the referee, nearer the players, deferred to the linesman further away over a tackle by Upson. Video replays show it as a risky but successful tackle. Anyway, Cool Hand Frank (F. Lampard) took over and scored from the spot. Whistle, confusion, disallowed: Chelsea players in the box before the kick was taken. Frank takes it again, different part of the goal, scores. Whistle, confusion, disallowed: Chelsea players in the box again. Frank runs up again, and scores at the other side of the goal. Whistle, referee points to centre circle. Goal!

Image via Wikipedia

Three penalties for the price of one. Bazaar qualities as well as bizarre? But how cool was that from Frank?


In a live interview immediately after the match, asked about how he felt while going through the penalty ordeal, Lampard said, "I could have done without that!" A great understatement. So refreshing, after the boyish blokes who whip off their shirts and glory about the pitch just for doing their job. In contrast,  this was a real professional!


Thanks to Frank, Chelsea got a point they did not deserve and now stand 4 points ahead of Man U at the top of the table -  having bizzarely won only one of their last four games, and that was close, against bottom of the table  Portsmouth. (Permission for the continued use of the photo of Lampard has been requested by e-mail. The photographer was Aleksandr Mysyakin for Soccer.ru)


Bizarre item 3
Mark Hughes, manager of Manchester City, whose 4-3 win against Sunderland at home was televised by Sky, was sacked after the match. Roberto Mancini, whom the former Chelsea manager, Jose Maurinho, replaced at Inter Milan, took over. Hughes with the camera on him during the match claims he did not know he was being sacked until it was over. In post match punditry on television I heard the remark," Won't this treatment (of Hughes) deter young English players from going into management?"

Like hell it will! Wait until we hear the amount of the pay-off. Hughes will never need to work again, but of course he will. And the next time no doubt he will be chosen by those who run the club and put their money into it. Unlike the Manchester City job where he was the sitting manager when new owners came in with huge funds to spend. He had the wonderful experience of spending it for them. The forlorn experience on the pitch and under the cameras for his last game will soon be forgotten. But it was bizarre viewing as the television screen switched from yet another goal by Sunderland and then the figure of the man in the overcoat on the touchline. Mercifully, Hughes was saved from a final touch of humiliation when his team did actually win!

{{subst:OP}}

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Glorious goals v Street-Wise ploys; "Nice" v Naughty

Saturday's match at Anfield with Liverpool at home to Arsenal ended with a win for the away team by 2 goals to 1. Arsenal's Arshavin struck like the proverbial cobra to provide one of those glorious goals that he and other people will remember because it was so economical in action and so far out of reach of goalkeeper Reina.

Of course, there should have been penalties, one in front of the referee when Gallas with the curious habit of tackling with his back-turned to both the direction of the ball and the opponent, unsurprisingly tripped a Liverpool player in the box. It would be interesting to know the referee's reason for letting it go. "Just clumsy," is surely not good enough particularly as it seemed to be Gallas's style of tackle. He did it on at least one other occasion.

I watched  Match of the Day on Sunday morning. The pundits were the two Alans: Shearer, a former forward, and Hansen, a former defender, and the defender it was who drew attention to an incident seemingly incidental to the footage of an Arsenal attack repulsed by Liverpool. "Did you notice Carragher's arm," he said. The video picks up the moment again as Arshavin and Carragher stand almost side by side facing the Arsenal goal some yards inside the Liverpool half. Carragher's arm is held out like an insect's feeler behind Arshavin's back. Its purpose, of course, was to act as an alarm signal if Arshavin suddenly turned to run past him - which he did as the attack began. "Street-wise," Hansen proudly pointed out, "Carragher has been around a long time!"

Another glorious goal this last weekend happened in the match Stoke v Wigan, result 2-2. The referee blew for a free-kick to Wigan for a foul on the left wing inside the Wigan half. "It could be Goal of the Season," said Hansen as the video showed Figueroa take the kick, a long ball over the penalty box - Sorensen out of his goal - and into the net. "Now watch," says smart Alan as the video restarts to illustrate his point. We see that just before the free-kick a Stoke player moves past the stationary ball. "Put your foot on it," says Hansen who went on to make it clear that the quick-witted and  'street-wise' player like himself  would have delayed the taking of the free-kick to allow his team-mates more time to get into position behind the ball. He would have done it simply by standing with his foot on the ball so that the kick could not be taken. We have all seen this done. The referee has to chase the offending player away with the threat of a yellow card or punish him immediately with one. In the latter case even more time can be taken up.

If this had happened Figueroa's glorious spontaneous goal that he will remember for the rest of his life would have been aborted. No chance of  making 'Goal of the Season'! But now it might.

Sorensen, by the way, saved a penalty from Rodallega to balance his account. It reminded me that I failed to turn up for the matches last week and did not report on other penalty saves. There were missed penalties from Arsenal's Fabregas, Tottenham's Defoe and, his first miss "since 2006" (commentator comment), Chelsea's Lampard.

For reports on the two matches mentioned please follow the links.


http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2009/dec/13/liverpool-arsenal-premier-league-match-report

 
http://www.premierleague.com/page/MatchReports/0,,12306~48595,00.html

Take your partners for the twist

My blogs have already affected the professional game as seen on television. In two games this weekend plus extracts on Match of the Day I didn't notice any shirt pulling or holding. In fact, the match at Portsmouth against Man Utd was a revelation in the war to ridicule shirt pulling. Why? Well, the referee awarded a penalty to Portsmouth signalling apparently that it was for such an incident. The penalty was taken and Portsmouth scored their only goal of the match - which they lost 4-1. Television revue programmes including BBC's Match of the Day could find no footage of shirts being pulled by the Man Utd players defending a high ball into the box. Vidic and crew were not doing it. Hard to believe, but obviously the opinions of this blog are being respected.

However, when one style of cheating declines then another appears or reappears. Two very clear examples of another cheating trick shown on Sky Sports 1's coverage of the Arsenal v Chelsea match would have each warranted a penalty kick if the referee had seen them. The first was by Arsenal's Sagna on Chelsea's Anelka who seemed to get past the Arsenal player and then fell down. Sagna's arm had gone around Anelka's waist from behind and then pulled backward to rotate Anelka's hips from the front. This overbalances a player moving forward, or striving to do so. Or if it doesn't overbalance him for that reason, the shock of being so intimately interfered with is also likely to do so.

This cheating twist was not the only one of its kind from this team. The second one was performed by Vermaelen the Arsenal defender when John Terry, the Chelsea captain, came into the penalty area for a free-kick taken by Lampard. After the Chelsea attack was successfully cleared by Arsenal, the cameras were able to show one reason why. Vermaelen had done the same as Sagna, the arm from behind encircles the waist then the hand at the front pulls backwards. Terry spun without falling but then Vermaelen hung on to Terry trying to spin him again. You could call it the Arsenal Twist or even Waltz if you like! Again the referee did not see it. And of course, if you asked Mr Wenger, the Arsenal manager, then he would not have seen it either. But he will tonight or tomorrow when he looks at the footage.

I hope that this experienced manager of the Arsenal team will say that this practised cheating must stop? (Well, isn't it practised, two players using it?) Instead, he will probably point out the incident when the ball was kicked a few inches in front of Chelsea's Cech's nose by Eduardo, Arsenal, and the fact that the referee disallowed the goal which followed. The referee saw it as 'dangerous play'. And another incident when Vela went stiff-legged and fell after a tackle in the box by a Chelsea player. This was a possible penalty to Arsenal except that Vela was waiting for it to happen, it seemed, and the referee is likely to see the false fall rather than the tackle.

It was a great match. The flair and movement of the Arsenal players being in the end contained by the strength and skill of the Chelsea team. The result of this gladiatorial contest full of dash and passion was Arsenal 0 Chelsea 3. But what do the players caught on camera feel when they see themselves performing the lower level skills? Shame or pride?


I am a Chelsea fan but I hope that I have been reasonable in my comments. There is no team completely free of cheating and I have pointed out examples of unfair play by Chelsea players.

Example from an October blog:

Why do professionals pull each others shirts? John Terry, captain of England, pulls the shirt of an opponent instead of trying to get to the ball himself. If the captain of the national team does it then it is open to all. All the footballers and all the kids at school.

I hope that my team have not learned any bad habits from their latest game.

Click for a full match report from The Daily Telegraph

Click here for the full match report from The Guardian

Not Rocket Science!

Watching Porto v Chelsea last night on our 28" television, I kept looking for Ballack. He is a big man, over six feet. Dark hair, good looking athlete. I knew that he was supposed to be playing from pre-match information. It was a Champions League Group match which Chelsea won 1-0. I thought it was him once when a Chelsea player approaching the Porto penalty area received and then passed the ball. The commentator didn't mention it. And if it was him I was not able to identify him again until he was substituted. I realise that I have watched many matches without identifying Ballack. Over several seasons. The next day when he is praised in the press I think ....where was he? Don't get me wrong, I am not blaming Ballack, he may well have had a good game. But to the television spectator he is just a nameless figure representing Chelsea. Like plenty of others.



Commentators don't just comment. They are also identifiers! Interpreters of the screen made of dots of colour. Get real! I know we have huge screens, but the shapes we see are only in two dimensions and only centimetres high in distance shots. My familiarity with a shape will surely develop given time spent watching the shape. But only if it is identified. I want to know who I am watching. Remember the radio? The commentator tells you who has the ball.


On my television, on a large screen, not on a small flickering postcard-sized 1960's meccano-set - when a minute figure picks up a pass in the centre near the penalty box I might be able to tell it is Drogba.  I have a fair idea of Drogba's shape. I think, "Shoot, Drogba, you world-beater you!" And I shout. "Let's have a goal Droggers, old son!
Then the lackey of a commentator says, "Lampard puts another shot wide."
He tells us who had the ball but only when the emotion it conjures has gone.


(Note:This was another match, not last night's; Lampard has put quite a lot of shots wide this so far this season, but in fact last night he was somewhere foreign having placenta treatment on his knee/thigh! How mad is that?)



And have you noticed how much more difficult it is to recognise players on screen WHEN THEY ARE WEARING THE AWAY STRIP? John Terry in the Chelsea blue is instantly recognisable, except in the very long shots. Put him in pink and you have no clue at all who it is. Last night Chelsea were in a kind of white but not England white. Chelsea also have grey shirts and black ones. This all adds to the confusion of who actually is playing, kicking, dribbling, tripping, diving, pulling shirts and taking throw-ins. The commentator is struck mute on this subject most of the time. But he is supposed to be at the match looking at real players and interpreting the game.



For corners and free-kicks you usually get a close-up shot and I can recognise the player - by the 30th game of the season when I have seen him in blue for a few matches, that is. Why don´t the commentators make sure we have the vital information: who the bloody hell has the ball? We can see figures on the pitch and the size of the crowd and all the adverts, come to that. We can see lots of irrelevant information on the screen BUT we want to know the name of the one WHO HAS THE BALL, and the name of the one who has it next, and so on.

Cech throws the ball to Ashley Cole who strokes it forward to Malouda .. Ballack .. Lampard .. Anelka .. Ivanovich coming forward .. Joe Cole  .. BALLACK (there he is)..Drogba .. on his back .. gets up .. unbelievable .. and shoots.

"It's a goal", shouts the commentator. "Drogba has scored a magnificent goal!"

It is not rocket science!

Fair Play and Replay: the French qualification for World Cup, 2010

The situation described in the last blog continues in the news: Thierry Henry's handling of the ball leading directly to a goal for France by Gallas. ( See below this piece)
               Apres vous Monsieur Duff. Non, apres vous, mon cher Thierry

A replay would be unwise, and possibly farcical, indignant as I am about the injustice to the Irish brought about by unfair play. They rose magnificently to the occasion and then were denied (well, not quite, they still had to score another goal in order to qualify on away goals). Clearly, the player is responsible. Henry said after the match that he did handle the ball but it was the referee's job to spot it, not his duty to point it out. This attitude reminds me of the lack of honesty in other walks of life where highly-paid professionals put themselves beyond the normal rules of reasonable conduct. The attitude of: "If we think we can get away with it, let's do it!". I am sure you can think of recent examples in banking and politics.

A replay goes into uncertain ground. There are so many incidents in a football match that are not judged correctly because the referee cannot see everything. The uncertainty of judging offsides, corners, handballs in general, and the institutionally endemic cheating such as shirt-pulling and pretending to be tripped (diving) are also difficult for referees to judge correctly. There was at least one corner and probably an offside that the referee may have got wrong in the match under discussion.


Fair play means, very simply, that the players should play fairly. The referee's job is to adjudicate situations where two teams of eleven individuals simultaneously co-operating and competing, inadvertently but sometimes intentionally, do not follow the rules of the game. To do this he needs the players to cooperate; why not? It is the players who must play fair. Everyone knows that the referee cannot see everything.

But, the very thought of the TV-soap drama of a replay makes me excited and want it to happen. Would Henry even play? Would it have to be on neutral ground? Would the crowd be vetted beforehand as if boarding an aircraft? Would the players feel like it was a real match? Imagine that the ball flies up in front of the French goal and an Irish player just cannot, cannot ....... stop himself from poking at the ball with a finger. It goes into the net! Goal! Goal! Goal

It would be wonderful on TV. And very difficult to resist!